EFT Choices Method
How to use EFT with Choices:
Choices = a type of affirmation used to consolidate gains made in EFT.
The formulating of the choice (or affirmation) is in itself a part of the therapy, serving to clarify your positive goals.
Dr. Patricia Carrington
Unlike the traditional affirmations mentioned in standard EFT, Choices do not contradict a person's present view of reality and so are much more easily accepted. Additionally, they represent a proactive stance and a commitment to one's self.
When using the Choices option, a self-acceptance affirmation is substituted for the traditional EFT affirmation (I deeply and completely accept myself). In general this affirmation is the opposite of whatever the negative statement contained in the first portion of the Set-Up phrase.
Choices Technique:
Identify the negative emotion or state (thought, attitude, feeling, pain, etc) that you want to be rid of.
Formulate a Choice that is roughly the opposite of this negative emotion or state.
Combine the negative emotion with the positive Choice.
State the entire Basic EFT recipe combination (negative emotion and Choice) on the first three meridian points.
Then alternate the points by stating the negative reminder phrase on one point and then the positive Choice or reminder Choice on the next point.
Be careful to always end on a positive Choice.
Wording of Choices:
Most people do not know how to identify what they really want. Ironically, however the, they are almost always very clear about what they don't want.
When asked to make a positive Choice, which is based on what they do want, most people will at best, just choose to improve a bit on what they don't like. One way they do this is to revert to comparisons. They will use such words as better or more.
Examples include:
· I choose to be more confident.
· I chose to feel better.
This does not work well because a person's subconscious, computer-like mind is quite literal and it cannot interpret that statement with any precision. What is better? It could be only a tiny bit better. How much is more? When this is not spelled out precisely you have an unclear Choice that will not be very effective.
Method:
1) First take the initial SUDS rating (a measure of distress on a 0 to 10 point scale) then proceed with the following steps:
2) Identify the negative cognition (attitude) you want to be rid of.
3) Next, formulate a Choice which is the exact opposite of this negative cognition For example: “I choose to feel wonderfully at ease when speaking in front of groups.” would be an appropriate Choice if the negative cognition were “Even though I’m afraid of public speaking”., etc.
4) Now combine the negative cognition with the positive Choice (which is the desired outcome) to form the set-up phrase. For example, “Even though I’m afraid of public speaking, I choose to feel wonderfully at ease when speaking in front of groups”.
5) Use the standard EFT protocol of tapping the Karate chop spot three times while repeating the set-up phrase.
Follow this by the “Choice Trio” as follows:
6) Do
7) Follow this immediately (without checking SUDS or doing another set-up) by
8) Follow this immediately (without checking Suds or doing another set-up) by
9) Retake the SUDS rating and if more work is needed, repeat the Trio (points 5, 6 and 7 above) as many times as necessary. In effect, the Trio serves as an extended “round”.
The reason order is so important here is that one of the most essential aspects of the Choice method is to have negative cognitions (thoughts/attitudes) followed by awareness of their positive desired outcomes. This results in direct LINKING of the negative with the positive — what NLP used to call “chaining”. This is a simple and powerful device. Using it, a negative thought can become an “anchor” (NLP term for a “trigger”) for a positive thought, so that in the future every time this person thinks of this negative possibility, the positive thought is likely to pop into their mind right afterwards.
Instruct the client to read over their choices at home, out loud, twice a day (at a minimum) — when first waking in the morning, and before going to sleep at night. They may carry the cards with them and read aloud the choices when they find themselves with spare moments during the day — such as in the car waiting for a traffic light to change, etc. Many people do this and some have even recorded their choices and listened to them on tape as they drive.
Rules
#1.Be specific
A choice needs to state precisely what it is that you want. No vague or comparative words like 'better' or 'more'
Don't: "I choose to get a better maths result"
Do: "I choose to get over 90% in my maths test"
Don't: I choose to have a larger house"
Do: "I choose to have a 4 bedroom house with a large garden situated within the countryside"
#2.Create Pulling Choices
Make the words colourful, appealing and attention getting. Make the Choice really attractive by using adjectives. A Choice must 'pull' to be really effective. Think of the Choice as a type of advertisement directed at yourself/client. They must really want to 'buy' into it.
"I choose to find a creative way to…"
"I choose to surprise myself by…"
"I choose to find it easy and enjoyable to…
"I choose to find it fun to…"
"I choose to feel satisfied by…"
"I choose to safe and comfortable to…"
"I choose to find it satisfying to…"
"I choose to find unexpected pleasure in…"
"I choose to find an ingenious way to…"
"I choose to be delighted by…
"I choose to find new and exciting ways to…"
"I choose to feel exhilarated by…"
#3. Go for the best possible outcome
You need to choose what you really want in your innermost self, not what you think you should want.
Don't: "I choose to have a new car"
Do: "I choose to have a 2007, navy blue, Golf convertible that runs like honey"
Don't: "I choose to have a new apartment"
Do: "I choose to live in a quiet, delightful and sunny apartment"
#4. State your choices in the Positive
The subconscious mind takes everything literally. An affirmation is a command - adding negative words confuse the subconscious mind. When making a Choice, avoid using negative words and phrases like "no," "not," "never," "don't," "be rid of" etc…
Don't: "I choose to be rid of my headache/I choose not to have a headache"
Do: "I choose to feel clear-headed and healthy"
#5. Don't choose for others
Don't: "I choose to have Jack love me"
Do: "I choose to feel that Jack loves me"
Don't: "I choose to have my boss appreciate me"
Do: "I choose to feel that my boss appreciates me"
Don't: "I choose to have Jane heal from her illness"
Do: "I choose to have Jane heal quickly from her illness, if this is in her highest interest/good"
Don't: "I choose to have Sarah suffer the consequences of (this act)"
Do: "I choose to be free of the consequences of this terrible act"
Universal Choices
“I choose to be calm and confident"
"I choose to feel confident and at ease"
"I choose to let it be easy"
“I choose to find it an exciting opportunity to try new things”
“I choose to have a sense of wonder and joy about life.”
Phobia Choices
“I choose to be calm and confident when public speaking/when speaking before groups".
“I choose to have serenity and peace within myself, no matter what.”
"I choose to feel at ease flying in planes"
“I choose to have a sense of wonder and joy about spiders"
Performance Choices
"I choose to get over 90% in my Maths test"
"I choose to improve my score by 10%”
Relationship Choices
"I choose to feel love from everyone I meet"
"I choose to find it easy to talk with strangers"
"I choose to feel lovable;"
"I choose to feel loved."
Weight
"I choose to find creative ways to keep fit/exercise"
"I choose to find it enjoyable to create low calorie meals"
"I choose to find exciting ways to raise my metabolism"
"I choose to loose weight in a healthy way"
"I choose to stick with my diet and feel comforted.”